Tuesday, February 14, 2012

My Married Valentine

Right as our first year of marriage almost reaches its close, we have another first: our first Valentine's Day as a married couple.

Valentine's Day in the media is so strange to me. On the one hand, a bombardment with material things that you should buy to represent your love. Understandable, as what companies want is any excuse to tell you to buy their products. On the other hand, an outpouring of hostility toward people who celebrate it. Perhaps understandable, if you think that the driving force in humanity is that misery loves company.

I'm live-and-let-live about it. It's okay for someone to want presents. It's okay for someone to ignore it entirely. It's okay to have mixed feelings about it. Morgan and I just choose to look at it as a day to remind us to appreciate each other. Which, by the way, doesn't mean we save up the appreciation for one day a year, or that we "need" the reminder. Much like we don't "need" a birthday to tell someone we love them and give them something they'll like, but it gives us a convenient date to do something a little extra special.

So is the day any different now that we're married? Not really. I mean, we're stuck with each other as permanent valentines (haha), but beyond that it's no different. We're not in a position to do a lot of celebrating. Besides the ever-present financial difficulties of the combined incomes of a graduate student and an artist, Morgan is in the thick of writing his dissertation. We can't really spare the time or the money this year.

We say "I love you" and "thank you" to each other on a daily basis quite possibly more often than any other people in the world. So in a lot of ways, it's just another day. But we acknowledge it anyway, and look forward to the years when we'll be able to do something out of the ordinary together to really mark the occasion.


  1. I freely admit I love Valentine's Day, even though I never have a Valentine! I think it just makes me feel "in love" even when I'm not. Or it gives me hope for the future!

    1. That makes me happy. It should be about an overall enveloping sense of love of all types, not about excluding people not in relationships. You grow up giving valentines to your friends, to your parents, and getting valentines from family members. Sure, it's often about a significant other as we get older, but it doesn't have to be. There should be plenty of love to go around. :)